Roads

I am lost on this road that I am on,
Where its to take me now I don't know.
Paths to chose from on everyside,
Which is best is still to decide
one day I will find the right path
It will be a rough and rocky but
eventually itwill end where I need to be.
Then it will turn and start all over
again leading me more and more in to the futer.
More to where I need to be to become
ther person that I really need to be,
The person that I really am.

Enough

All that you want,
is to please others,
to make them happy.
But is it worth,
pleasing everyone,
if you have to hurt,
the one person
that ment the most.

The person that,
loved you more,
than anything or
anyone else on
this intire planet.
The person that,
wanted to be there,
for you no matter what,
Who was willing to
go through good
and bad as long as
it ment they were
going to be with you.

Shouldn't it,
be enough,
there love,
your love for them,
for you to not want to
please everyone else,
but for you to please,
the one that loved you.

But its not
enough for you,
And it wil never be,
enough for you.
I will never be enough,
or good enough for you.

not enough

Love,
Its not enough for you,
to stay with me,
Its not enough for you
to fight against what,
everyone else says,
What they think,
Im not enough,
for you to be happy,
enough for you to try,
enough to give you hope,
so maybe you never,
really did love me,
becauase love should,
be enough
to fight through everything,
No matter what.

He...

he said forever,
He didn't mean it.
He said he loved me,
but Im not enough.
He doesn't know what
love really means to me.
Love is a promise,
He doesn't understand that,
he doesn't see that.
He can go out with other girls,
before he brakes up with me.
Thats not right,
Its not good,
It hurt me,
He hurt me,
He made me cry,
tell there were no more tears,
but then they came again,
and they are still coming,
because he hurt me,
he broke my hear,
and he doesn't know,
he doesn't know the
damage he has done.

Pain

He has hurt me,
But he has taught me,
so much about myself,
about what i need,
What is going to be
right for me.
and I know now that it,
is not him no matter,
how much it pains me to say it.

Hurt

He took my heart,
He stole it,
He took care of it
but only long enough
to drop it,
To stomp on it,
to shatter it into,
thousands of little peices.
He has hurt me beond repair.
I will never fully
heal from this.
I have lost hundreds of tears
for a boy who didn't care
about me enough to,
stand up for me,
to stand up for us,
and everything we were.
But I will never make,
that mistake again,
I will never love him again,
for he does not love me,
The way I should be loved.

What is....

What is life without love,
What is love without pain,
What is pain without tears,
What are tears without sarrow,
What is sarrow without darkness,
What is darkness without light,
What is light without happiness,
What is happiness without peace,
What is peace without love,
What is love without life.

Lost

I have hurt you,
in so many ways.
And i regret it all,
for I have lost something,
rather remarkable.

I've lost my first
"I Love You"
My first real smile,
My shooting star.
My chance with you.

And I can cry,
And I can say Im sorry,
but I can never make
you love me again.
for you deserve,
someone so much better,
than what I could ever be.

Someone that is,
paitent and kind.
Someone to make you smile,
when you are sad.
Some that is what,
I could never be.

Wrong

I use to think

that having you with me,

or having you love me,

was the most important thing,

in this world.

But i was wrong,

its not having you with me,

or having you love me

that matters the most.

But its having you alive,

its knowing that your breathing,

Its knowing that your making it through

this cruel world.

Dream

The world began with love,

its from love that we were born,

from the day we were born we have been loved.

To be loved is what we dream about,

from the time we were little kids,

Its the dreams that make love so unbelievable

when it finally becomes a reality.

The reality is so much more than,

we could have ever dreamed of.

Without or with

Without love there would only be darkness

Without love there would only be hate

Without love there is only war,

Without love there is no hope,

Without love there is only the dead silence,

Without love there would be no you and me.

With love there is light everywhere,

With love there is joy and happiness,

With love there is a sense of peace,

With lover there is the hope of a million souls,

With love there is the sound whispering giggles,

With love there is a chance for us to be together forever,

Lost and Found

We can run

and we can hide,

but we will always be found,

by the ones we love.

They know all of our

best hidding spots,

Where we go when were

mad, or sad, or scared.

They know how to act like,

they stumbled across us.

When theyve really been looking,

sence the second we started running.

He is...

He is always there,

to talk to when im lonely,

to hold me when im sad,

to protect me when im scared,

to listen when im mad,

to laugh with when im happy,

to love me no matter what.

He is amazing,

He is my everything,

He is my love.

Fight

How can we yell,

and scream,

at those that we love.

How can we leave someone

when we promise,

we will be there forever.

Roads

Theres two roads to chose from,

the first being straight and easy to fallow,

the second full of mountains and easy to get lost on.

Chosing is the easy part,

Its fallowing through the road,

tell you come across the next roads

to chose from thats the hard part.

Making it all the way through

sometimes feels more like a mirical

than anything else.

No matter what road we chose

we will make it through every opstical

that we come across.

(threw it together its not that good but oh well)

Older Poem

Older poem found it while looking through my other blog..

Its bright out side,

but dark with in,

Rain falls down and lands on my heart,

While everything else rings with rainbows,

Lost choosing which way to go,

The clouds are gone for the moment,

but catch back up to me,

pushing me back into the darkness.

Farther then i have ever been before,

Grasping for something better,

Waiting for something good to happen to me,

and as soon as it does,

I fear of falling back into the darkness.

Stronger

(Writin September 22nd, 2009)

Everything we go through is ment to help us,

get through tomorrow,

a year,

and evan a life time

It makes us stronger,

helps us get throught the worst,

that is yet to come.

It makes us who we are,

and no matter what,

it makes us a berrer person,

than we were before.

Light

Everything was dark,

but you made me see,

how light the world can really be.

Tear

Every Drop is a sign for every tear,

A tear for saro,

A tear for sadness,

A tear for hope,

A tear for happiness,

A tear for love.

Believe

I use to believe,

that love could not be.

I use to see,

All the bad around me,

But now its all came clear,

and I can see,

Whats really ment to be,

All because you believe in me.

Being loved

Being loved,

Its knowing that theres some one there,

to talk to and share every secret with.

Having a person that is always wanting,

to hold you in thier arms,

And just to see you smile,

Its th one person that understands.

Stronger

Everything we go through

is ment to help us

get through tomorrow,

a year and even a life time,

It makes us stronger,

helpping us get through the worst

that is yet to come.

It makes us who we are

and no matter what it makes us,

it makes us a better person,

than we were before.

Watch

Its so hard to sit and watch,

watch you feel so much pain,

not knowing how to help,

or if I ever could.

Not kowing if you will ever be ok,

if things could ever be the same.

I use to believe that it was imposibe,

impossible to feal in love,

to find love,

and to know if it was really love.

I was wrong.

Love,

Its the butterflies racing through my stomic,

the fealling of being dropped a thousand feet,

Not knowing whats going to happen,

having to trust that things are going to be ok,

Its knowing someone is their,

through everything we go through,

even the days that feel,

like the world has ended,

and is never to start back up agian.

Love is amazing,

and its touched me,

I never thought it would but it has,

and its the best thing i have ever felt.

Circle of life.

Today the world stopped,

Just for a moment,

Long enough for a life to stop,

long enough for an end,

something leaving for the better,

something to set their soul free,

long enough for something good to happen.

There is something being born,

there is something coming to life,

something entering this world,

to make life better,

for everyone in it.

The World Has Stoped....

The world has stopped and now I can see,

that it was not just you that was wrong,

but it was also me.

The world has stopped for me and I can see,

What I have become and how I need to change,

For what we have done has hurt us both.

The world has stoped for us and now we see,

How we have grown so far away,

We can see our past and how it use to be.

The world has stoped and now we can all see,

That even if we grow far away,

We can alwasy come back home.

Reflected

This change may have been good for you,

but not for me,

Evry choice you have made,

has been reflected on me,

These choices you have made,

once brought hope to me.

And now they only frighten me.

Here, Gone, and Coming back.

I use to feal close.
I use to feal inspired
I use to feal welcome,
I use to be happy to be here,
I use to want to come here.
Now, I only feal distance,
Im disgusted by what you have become,
Im lonly when im here
Tears are the only thing I feal,
This is the last place I want to be.

This is how i felt. Untill.... I talked to my dad last night,

As of the moment IM,
Glad I came,
Im glad I wasn't afraid to say how I feal,
to let everything out and show how things have been to me,
youve shown me that you have changed...
Youve shown me that i need to adapt to change,
youve taught me that i need to adapt to the world.

Changing

We are always changing,
For the good and the bad,
Learning more about ourselves,
and the world around us.
Finding out who we are,
and the people around us are.

Crumble

The world is crumbling down.
Smashing into tiny bits,
Falling into a deep black whole,
Never knowing when to come back out.

Abandoment

Its one of the things we fear the most,
Its the thought of being alone.
The silence and the emptyness,
knowing that no one is there,
to catch us when we fall.
No sholder to cry apon.

Crash!!!!

We fall and break,

We stuble and crash,

We feal the world comming,

to a scraching stop.

As all we know comes falling down.

Shattering into a thousand peices,

Stumbling over pieces of glass,

Crashing down onto the ice cold ground.

Every thing still and quite.

Falling

Falling for some one,

can be one of the most exciting,

but frightning things we can ever experence.

Some falls are long,

hard, and imposible to get up from.

Others short,

easy to get up from

But the best feeling of the fall,

is the things that inspire hope.

The little things that make us think,

that they feel the same,

like when they say hi for the first time,

or when we relize they've remembered our name.

Older Poems

Here are some of my older poems from my other blog.

May 5th, 2009
Missing My Home

Theres a place that we all can call home,
a place where we know that we are safe,
a place that we fill like were know and welcome,
The place where we took are first steps,
and said our first words.
Theres a place that has the school,
that we started kindergarten.
The school that taught us the first thing,
about a true friends ship about a sisterhood.
Theres a place where all of our family is.
Where you learned to ride a bike.
All of the great things about being a kid.
Well my home is a little town called Evanston Wyoming.

April 2nd, 2009
Fish

Fighting through the current,
Tring to brake free of the oceans,
High waves that are capped with white,
Swimming, swooshing the water around,
Bright with bright and vibrant colors,
Living with a school and not just as one,

The ocean is my home,
Always having a mind of its own,
Tall and high waves brush sandy beaches,
and crashing into large clifs, and rocks
Shells all along the floor with bright reefs.

March 22nd, 2009
The Storm That Has Come

The sun has been wiped away,
there is grayness in the air,
drops of water mix with drops of salt,
down my face soaking into my jacket.
The world is still and quite,
my thoughts reach deep down inside.
I try to hold everything in,
like a sponge holds in water, but
I can only take so much and go so far.
I release a little and here soon,
the sun will come back out and i will hide,
just like the dropplets hide back in the clouds.
Waiting for the next storm to release a little more,
waiting for the storm that will release me free.

Falling

We all know the feeling,

of being in love,

even if its not perminit.

We know the feeling,

of falling so hard,

that we could never catch our selves,

even if we had or really needed to.

We know the feeling,

that nothing else matters in the world,

other than that one person,

thats caused us to fall.

We know the feeling,

of never wanting to let go,

even if its better for us.

We know the feeling,

of someone stealling our heart,

and no matter how hard we look,

we can never find it or get it back.

We know the feeling,

of love

Choices

We all feal the challenges of life,

and the choices we have to make,

We feal the rewards and the concequences,

the joy and the pain,

of the desisions that we chose to make.

We feal the lonelyness and togetherness

that result in our choices.

We feal the thoughts that press in our mind,

of weather or not we made the right or wrong desision.

We feal the happyness,

of right, or better desision.

We feal the devestation,

of the wrong desision.

Change

Rivers are always changing,

just like the coarse of life,

nothing is always set and stone,

sure to happen.

Sometimes its the person that changes,

as they discover who they are,

and who the people around them are,

They find out who they want to be,

or even where they want to go.

But It's not always the person that changes,

sometimes it the places around them,

as they find out what is really hidden within a town or city,

wether it be good or even bad its always a change,

One of the most comon things to change the coarse,

would be the people around you,

friends, family, Peers, Even people you don't even know.

They are also going through changes,

but everything is conected to each other,

like a river to a lake and even the ocean.

Every disision we chose to make or others make,

effect not just one person but everyone in some way.

Good out comes cause hope and optimisum,

but the bad out comes cause wars and depression.

Thinking

Sometimes I wonder...

I wonder why things happen,

I wonder when things are going to get better,

I wonder if people really care when they say they do,

I wonder what things would be like if they turned out diffrently,

I wonder how people can trust someone after they have been lied to,

I wonder why people see things the way that they do,

I wonder how many tears have been sheaded,

I wonder how people treat others the way they do,

I wonder how much pain someone has to go through before they find love,

I wonder what other people feel when they see bad things happen to good people,

I wonder if any one has felt the same things I have felt,

I wonder how the people who have gone through the same things as me feal,

I wonder what its like to know that someone will always be there,

I wonder...

About this blog

For me i have learned that one ofthe bestways to get something off my mind is to write about it. I like to write poems when im mad or sad. When im in the car and just thinking which i do alot of i usually write poems in my head. Usually i don't have anything to write them down with but usually when i do they get rid of the thoughts that cause me to feal the way i usually do. I've been through alot thoughout the last 14 years. And for some reason writing always helps